This is such a hauntingly beautiful story and i can’t rec it enough. I’m not good with words, I can only express it through art, and I hope I did the story justice.
so if you ever thought to yourself, “what this fandom needs is more anal hooks, but i don’t wanna be the first,” i helped you out there. you’re welcome.
and if you’re seeing this on a sunday morning bc timezones, consider going to church
Also, this would explain a lot about Steve. His recklessness and his morals. XD
EDIT: JUST IMAGINE LIL STEVE ROGERS RUNNING HEADFIRST INTO DANGER ‘CAUSE THAT’S WHAT AUNT DIANA DOES? AND BUCKY RUNNING AFTER HIM ALL, “YOU ARE NOT ZEUS’S OFFSPRING, STEVE, YOU COULD DIE.”
#steve rogers #bucky barnes #SOLD #posthumous medals usually go to the closest living next of kin #i don’t know what would happen if there wasn’t any next of kin found #so let’s just say the DOD held on to them #in a nice display case somewhere #the congressional medal of honor with its blue ribbon fading from the light #the POW medal (awarded in the 80s after it was created because bucky barnes is one of war’s most famous POWs of course they would award it t #the distinguished service cross #the purple heart #one for being wounded and one for dying #the president jokes that they shold take that second one back #and everyone’s surprised when bucky laughs #there are others too; some major some minor #they’re all there #he’s never going to put on that uniform again so they’ll never hang from his jacket #shining and heavy #other than this once #but the way steve’s hands shake as he fastens each pin #and the way steve kisses him when they’re all lined up neat over his heart #he’ll carry that weight
But can we agree that Bucky Barnes pretty much took his super villain origin story in First Avenger and said “nope”? He watched the kid he constantly looked out for and defended and tried to cheer up suddenly become not just a hero, but THE hero. He watched himself suddenly become unnecessary for his friend to get by. There was clearly some resentment going on exacerbated by the heavy amount of torture he underwent. It was a similar situation to Loki, only Bucky had always been in the favored role and suddenly loses it. This would be the point that most characters would be seen simmering and brooding and either betray the hero and only redeem themselves by death or let their envy get the better of them and decide to take on the hero. And Bucky just…doesn’t. He has his moment of private hurt and pain and he regroups. His friendship is more important than his pride and he seamlessly steps aside to take a supporting role. He never flinches. There’s never any moment where you even see him THINK about betraying Steve. There’s no scene where he pauses before he helps him. Nothing.
Which is why HYDRA turning him into a monster is even more horrific. Because Bucky had already rejected going that route on his own. They had to MAKE him one. They had to force him. It would have been so easy for Bucky to have become the villain…and he doesn’t even consider it. Bucky is a victim in so many ways.
*sciency ramblings about bucky’s arm with a bit of angst*
I made a gifset yesterday that highlighted Bucky’s nervous habit of clenching and unclenching his metal fist, right after Steve says “I need you to do better than ‘I don’t know’”. Later on in that scene, there’s a brief shot of him sitting, hunched over, and wringing both of his hands together.
Both of these instances say a lot about how much sensitivity the limb has, specifically in the fingertips; the technology is so advanced that it’s a part of him in the most literal sense, and he unconsciously treats it as such.
The arm also has a clear sense of pressure and touch, as demonstrated in CA:TWS (that one scene with the tiny, round explosive device that everyone is fond of making gifsets of for really weird reasons) and CA:CW (he tests plums for ripeness by gently squeezing them).
I’m guessing there are a ton of electrodes embedded in the internal mechanism, all of which allow him to control and manipulate the arm, recieve sensations of pressure, heat, cold, texture, etc. Whether he can feel ‘pain’ is debatable, considering he was able to use his metal arm as a brake along several feet of roadway, but there’s definitely got to be some sort of equivalent in order to warn him if he’s going to damage it–and it would take significant trauma in order for that to happen. In general though, his brain treats the prothesis like a real arm.
All this to say: getting the whole shebang ripped off at the shoulder joint by an arc reactor beam probably felt like he was losing his flesh arm all over again. Because it’s the same concept–all the signals that his brain was recieving from the prothesis are suddenly gone. Right after losing his arm, he passed out for several several minutes, and when he came to, he could hardly move, and if that doesn’t indicate severe pain, I don’t know what does.
I mean, think about it. Bucky is one of those people who doesn’t go down easily. He spent 90% of his screentime in CA:TWS getting the crap kicked out of him, and hardly made a sound. As the Winter Soldier, he was taught to disregard physical damage to his body in order to complete the mission. That suicidal endurance isn’t going to go away. It’s as much a part of him as his arm was, and will permanently affect his combat behaviors.
So when Bucky is physically unable to give any contribution to a fight beyond grabbing his opponent’s ankle, it’s a pretty good indicator that he’s Suffering™.
I was looking for metas about this scene, but I couldn’t find anything, so decided to say several words myself.
Firstly, I made one gifset and captioned it as glare of death and people wrote that Bucky looks like he’s about to cry or has already cried. Tbh, I think it’s both. Great thing about this scene, to my mind, is not if he’s feeling anger or pain, but the fact that he’s definetely feeling something here!
As I remember, we only see two moments where Bucky is feeling something. First one is this:
Here, he’s angry af. Before this moment, we see hydra agents shooting wildly, but WS is calm, he casually walks and shoots for like two or three times only. But when Nat breaks his glasses(sorry, don’t know what they’re called), he becomes crazy and starts shooting without aiming properly. He feels anger and frustration.
Second one is a bit of confusion and hesitation:
(not my gif)
Throughout the whole movie, what catches our eyes is how calm ws is. He isn’t running, he never is in a hurry. Of course, he kills people, fights like an assassin, but he is always laid-back and really relaxed.
But in the final scenes, he acts like a crazy. WS’ actions are so brutal. Although he is sent to missions to kill people, I don’t think that winter soldier is allowed to make them personal. I mean that he must finish the missions succesfully, but he must know show his personal attitude towards it.
But here
He slaughters hydra/shield agents in a way that is screams to be really personal to me. He freaking shot that pilot and didn’t even care to throw away the body. He’s just to eager to get to Steve. Yes, it is his mission, but so was that causeway scene and his actions in these situations are so different from each other.
Considering all of these, I believe that in that scene he is not unemotional. WS is about to finish his missions, not only because hydra ordered him, but because Steve makes him feel things that causes him pain and confusion and uncertainity.
Is he angry? Yes. Is he ] eager to kill Steve in the most brutal way? Hell, yes. Is he also feeling pain? He IS! I think that he’s torn between too many emotions and that reflects in his eyes. They are deadly, but at the same time a bit red and look like he’s gonna cry.
To be sure I have to look once again at this moment:
He looks so childish and it feels like he’s suffering. But then:
See how he narrows his eyes for a second? Yes, he’s in misery, but that eye narrowing thing also tells me that WS is also furious and wants to visiously kill his oponent.
P.S. Please, add your thoughts ‘cause I’m so interested in the interpretation of this scene.